The Hitman’s Bodyguard Review



Sometimes you leave a comedy having laughed uncontrollably throughout the film. Other times you leave realizing that the funniest parts of the film were already shown to you during the trailer. Sadly, the latter experience is what I had after watching The Hitman’s Bodyguard. That in no way means that I thought this was a terrible film. It hit the marks it needed to, when it needed to, for the most part. Ryan Reynolds and Samuel L. Jackson had fantastic chemistry on-screen as Michael Bryce and Darius Kincaid respectively. The rest of the film however was your typical “paint by numbers” action-comedy. The basic plot of the film is that two enemies are forced to team up to escape a dire situation. For such a basic plot I expected there to be a lot more comedy involved to get us through the rest of the film. Instead we got the same flat jokes over and over again. Most of the film’s comedy actually came from Samuel L. Jackson’s character. I was expecting him to be funny, but I was expecting more from Ryan Reynolds. Reynolds is known for his comedic roles in film and could have elevated this film so much if he was given better material to work with. The writers maybe should have given more of the comedic lines to him and left Jackson’s character a tad more serious. Élodie Yung did an okay job as Amelia Roussel, but her role was not substantial enough for me to buy into her connection to Michael Bryce. Salma Hayek was hilarious as Darius’ wife Sonia, but her role in the film was also limited and left one wanting a little more. Gary Oldman on the other hand should have been in the film even less than he was. His Russian accent was terrible and I felt like he was mailing it in the entire time. On a positive note the film has some great action and chase sequences. The director Patrick Hughes clearly learned a lot from filming The Expendables 3 and transferred it to this film. The fight sequences with Reynolds were very well choreographed. With some better writing this film could have easily been the best comedy of the year. The studio did a great job marketing the film and it has very little competition to go up against for the rest of August. Therefore it should make a decent chunk of change and make back its low budget. I give The Hitman’s Bodyguard a Normal 6.8/10. I’d be willing to see Ryan Reynolds and Samuel L. Jackson work together on a sequel as long as it has better writing and the box office of this film warrants it. Also not once was “I Will Always Love You” played during the film. That was a big missed opportunity.

Rick and Morty “Vindicators 3: The Return of Worldender” Review

Screen Shot 2017-08-14 at 12.59.08 AMWhat do you get when you combine Guardians of the Galaxy and Saw with Rick and Morty? “Vindicators 3: The Return of Worldender” is what you get. This episode was not what I expected and that’s a good thing. It starts out one way, changes halfway through, and ends with something totally unexpected. Morty is excited when he and Rick get a call to join the Vindicators on a mission. Rick quickly declines, but Morty invokes his right to choose one in every ten of their adventures. Something Rick agreed to in the season one episode “Meeseeks and Destroy”. The title of the episode comes from the fact that this is the third big Vindicators mission. Morty thinks it is the second, but soon finds out that they were passed over for the second mission due to Rick’s overwhelming personality. The great part about this episode is how it constantly spoofs the superhero movies, more specifically the Guardians of the Galaxy films. Rick alludes to the surprising success of the first film and how a sequel was not necessary. Then, later in the episode, he talks about how much lamer the Vindicators are the second time around. This is a nod to some critics thinking Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 being not as good as the first film. As the episode goes on we learn that Rick, while a member of the Vindicators, does not like them very much. He even has his own superhero name that perfectly matches his skillset. He wishes that his grandson looked up to him as he looks up to the other Vindicators. I love how this episode also sets up the fact that Rick and Morty actually go on numerous adventures and the episodes we see are only are only just a few of them. Morty pretty much knows Rick to a fault at this point and kind of saves the day just by knowing how messed up his grandfather’s thought process is. Apparently Rick has gotten Morty in many similar situations during his drunken blackouts. Sadly, during the course of the episode, Morty has to watch as his childhood heroes are broken down in front of him. Proving that he placed them on a pedestal when they aren’t all that special. It was almost if Rick was the Joker and the rest of the Vindicators were Harvey Dent. With just a little push he brought them down to his level of insanity. In the end, Rick’s numerous points are made and Morty becomes a little more depressed about the universe. I give “Vindicators 3: The Return of Worldender” a Good 4.6/5. There were a good few laughs to be had during this episode, especially when Rick breaks down how stupid each Vindicator’s names and powers are. Also it was nice seeing Revolio Clockberg Jr. aka Gearhead again as I thought he was dead.

Rick and Morty “Pickle Rick” Review

im-pickle-riiiiickWow, this is the episode of Rick and Morty we have been waiting for. Ever since season 3 started back in April we’ve all been waiting to see “Pickle” Rick on screen. Now that I have seen the episode I can say that it did not disappoint! “Pickle Rick” shows us the Smith family, minus Jerry, going to therapy to find out the root of all of their issues. Rick gets out of the session by turning himself into a pickle. He set it up so that he could change back into a human as soon as the family left, but of course his plan is changed when Beth takes his serum with her to the therapy session. “Pickle Rick” was an overall great episode filled with action and comedy. Once again Rick proves how intelligent he is by surviving the day as an immobile pickle. While it is not explicitly stated, we are also enlightened to the fact that Rick needs adventure like its a drug. The writer of the episode, Jessica Gao, doesn’t go into detail exactly how he created all the things he did, but we get enough tidbits so that we can just go along on the adventure with him. We also get to learn more about Rick and Beth’s psyche through their interactions with their therapist and each other. This episode contains one of the few times we hear Rick praying to God to save his life. Yet, in the after credits stinger — which is a must watch — he once again goes back on his belief. This is a very interesting aspect of Rick’s character, as we really don’t know what he truly believes in. We are also reminded how little Rick cares about Beth, since he has infinite Beths to choose from. This ties back to Rick telling Morty in “Rickmancing the Stone” about how they have infinite Summers to choose from. This means technically everyone has infinite relatives in different dimensions. A fact that Rick accidentally let slip to his new friend Jaguar, who is voiced by the ever so cool Danny Trejo, and immediately retracted. Going back to Beth, we see how her relationship with her Rick affects her and her children. She knows that Rick doesn’t actually need her in his life, but hungers so much for his approval and respect. This clearly stems from him not being apart of her childhood. This may actually be true for every Beth in every timeline/dimension. She clearly needs therapy, but my not continue going. Morty and Summer understand this fact, but can’t do anything to change it. I give “Pickle Rick” a Superb 5/5. This episode was funny from start to finish. Clearly mimicking action movies such as Die Hard and Rambo.

Rick and Morty “Rickmancing the Stone” Review

rickmancing the stone

Wow, four months later and we finally got to see what Rick, Morty, and Summer have been up to. “Rickmancing the Stone” picks up shortly after “The Rickshank Rickdemption” with Rick, Morty, and Summer returning immediately from one adventure to go on another. This episode is a clear spoof of the Mad Max franchise and Romancing the Stone, with the gang journeying to a dimension populated by murderous, cannibalistic, biker gangs. Spoofs are not new to the series, as they have spoofed movies before, including: Jurassic Park, A Nightmare on Elm Street, and Inception. The show itself is a lose spoof of Back to the Future. The “Mad Max” world however was drawn with greater imagination than the others as each of the background characters look different and unique. I enjoyed the straightforward storyline of this episode and how it dealt with how each member of the Smith family tries to move forward. This allows us to relate more to the characters before the season goes off on a tangent, as they usually do. While in this “Mad Max” dimension we get to see how the divorce of Beth and Jerry affects the rest of the family. While Morty is very upset and angry about the divorce, Summer is unfeeling, repressing any emotion about the matter. Rick is clearly happy to have Jerry gone, but Beth isn’t sure she made the right decision. Unfortunately, Jerry got the short end of the stick this episode, as we did not see much of him, but when we did I couldn’t help but laugh at his misery. The episode did not veer off to far from the usual craziness of the show, but was clearly milder than others. In a sense, it was a satire of how families deal with divorce in today’s society and will probably be the underlying story for most of this season. The main focus of the episode was Summer as she is officially a part of the “Rick and Morty” group now. I have a feeling this trend of her inclusion on adventures will continue throughout the rest of the season as well. I did notice at one point in this episode that Rick still cares for Morty more than Summer, as he is willing to leave Summer behind in one instance, reminding Morty that he has infinite Summers to chose from. Given that the name of the show hasn’t changed to “Rick, Morty, and Summer”, this makes perfect sense for the series to remind us of that fact. I only wish we got to see more of Beth, Jerry, and the robots Rick left behind to impersonate him and the kids. Hopefully we get to see them again before the season ends. I give “Rickmancing the Stone” an Average 3.8/5. Also wait to watch the stinger after the credits. In my opinion it is one of the funniest scenes in the entire episode.

‘Rick And Morty’ Is ‘Back To The Future’ On Acid


If you have never seen Rick and Morty then you need to get on it because that show is hilarious! Also, you should probably stop reading this article because it will contain SPOILERS for the show. Full episodes can be found on the Adult Swim website. For those who have seen the show, you know how crazy and nonsensical it is. Also, while watching, you may have thought the premise was somewhat familiar. Even for younger audiences, something about the show may have reminded you of something you couldn’t quite put your finger on. This is because the show is a strange parody of Back to the Future. (A lot of bells just went off in your heads, I’m sure.) The show clearly takes that plot and stretches it out into crazier adventures.

The Real Adventures of Doc and Mharti

The basis for Rick and Morty was a short-lived web series spoof created by Justin Roiland known as The Real Adventures of Doc and Mharti. The web series was designed to parody the characters of Doc Brown and Marty McFly, from the Back to the Future film trilogy. The fans reacted to it wildly, and Roiland began creating more shorts involving the characters. Soon, the shorts evolved beyond Roiland’s original intentions of being a Back to the Future parody, leaving behind the premise and the obvious origins of the characters from the film series from which was its inspiration. After releasing the short for Channel 101, Adult Swim approached Harmon for television show ideas. He and Roiland developed the program based on the short, eventually replacing the characters of Doc and Mharti with Rick and Morty, respectively.

Episode Structure

Portal Gun

The general structure of a Rick and Morty episode usually consists of the apposition of two conflicting scenarios. Rick, an extremely selfish, alcoholic grandfather drags his grandson, Morty, across space and time for intergalactic and/or interdimensional adventures, while also dealing with domestic family drama. The show has been described as a combination between Back to the Future and Matt Groening’s two shows: The Simpsons and Futurama. The show often ignores continuity but, at the same time, doesn’t break it. This is because of the multiple universes and timelines that Rick and Morty explore. A prime example of this is when Rick mutates the world in the episode “Rick Potion #9” and decides to take Morty to a separate “earth” where the versions of them have just died, so they can take their place and start over. Morty even mentions this to his newly replaced sister a few episodes later. This format allows the creators to do whatever they want because there are infinite timelines and universes for them to work with.

“On one of our adventures, Rick and I basically destroyed the whole world, so we bailed on that reality and we came to this one, because in this one, the world wasn’t destroyed and in this one, we were dead. So we came here, a- a- and we buried ourselves and we took their place. And every morning, Summer, I eat breakfast twenty yards away from my own rotting corpse. […] Nobody exists on purpose, nobody belongs anywhere, everybody’s gonna die. Come watch TV?”

Crazy Characters


Rick and Morty is known for its kooky characters. The namesake characters’ family is basically what it would be like if Doc Brown was a drunk and a member of Marty McFly’s family, with a few tweaks for good measure. From the generally level-headed Beth, to the very insecure and sometimes idiotic Jerry, the show has a wide range of characters to choose from. Rick has a strong influence over the characters’ lives, whether they like it or not. This is mostly because he is the “smartest being in the universe,” but also because he selfishly involves them in his schemes. Even though new and recurring characters appear almost every episode, the Smith family is the main focus. And even though Morty gets the brunt of it, he has recently started including his niece, Summer, in the adventures as well. Rick’s daughter, Beth, longs for her father’s attention, while his son-in-law, Jerry, just wants Rick out of their lives.

We should thank director Robert Zemeckis, as his Back to the Future trilogy inspired one of the craziest cartoons of our generation. The first episode of the third season of Rick and Morty was aired on April 1st as an April Fools’ Day joke. You can find my review of that episode here. The rest of the season is set to premiere on July 30th at 11:30 pm ET.

What are your thoughts on Rick and Morty? What is your favorite episode? Are you excited for Season 3? Leave your thoughts below.

Rick and Morty “The Rickshank Rickdemption” Review

S3e1_RickandBugI know I’m late as this episode aired on April Fools Day 2017, but I feel its time to review it as the third season will be starting in a few weeks. With that being said this review will contain mild (SPOILERS) so reader beware. Lets just start with how amazing “The Rickshank Rickdemption” is as a whole! Picking up shortly after “The Wedding Squanchers” (RIP Birdperson) we see Rick being interrogated in the Galactic Federation prison by Cornvelious Daniel, voiced so wonderfully by Nathan Fillion. The Galactic Federation is using a machine called the Brainalyzer to send Daniel inside Rick’s brain to gather information about Rick’s Portal Gun. This all takes place hilariously in a visualization of Shoney’s. Rick however sees through the illusion, even commenting on how the Brainalyzer was a series 9000 and claiming that the “cheap alien fucks didn’t think he was worth their best equipment!” We also get to see how things are going with the Smiths. Some are adjusting better than others on an Earth run by the Galactic Federation, with Jerry and Morty dealing with the situation and Beth and Summer not too happy about it. From here the episode takes us on many twists and turns as Rick and Cornvelious delve deeper into Rick’s mind as he tries to get Rick to tell him the formula for his Portal Gun and Morty and Summer pay a visit to Morty’s original home in Dimension C-137. Seeing Summer meet Summer C-137 aka Hunger Games Summer was just perfect. All of this leads to Rick’s amazing escape allowing him to take down the Galactic Federation and The Council of Ricks. All around this episode was Superb. It proved once and for all that Rick C-137  is the smartest being in the universe, even possibly smarter than all the other Ricks. All of the jokes landed and it got me excited for the rest of the season! In true fashion this episode wrapped up previous storylines while opening up an infinite possibility of future storylines. Rick does advise Morty in the end that this will be the darkest year of their adventures. Here’s to hoping he’s right! I give “The Rickshank Rickdemption” a Superb 5/5! Hopefully McDonald’s eventually brings back a special version of the Mulan Szechuan Sauce for us to enjoy.

Rick and Morty Season 3 begins July 30th at 11:30 pm ET.

Transformers: The Last Knight Review



I never thought the day would come where I would say this, but Transformers: The Last Knight is a bad movie. I hurts me to even type the words. The movie isn’t bad because of the action or the visuals. Those are amazing and Michael Bay always delivers in that aspect. This movie is bad because of the plot. Basically there is no plot! I am a stickler for continuity and I expect with each new film in a franchise that continuity errors would be cleaned up nicely. This movie takes that notion and throws it in the trash. Nothing in this movie makes sense. Its like a mixture of three films all of the while rehashing the plot from Transformers: Dark of the Moon. They try to explain why the Transformers keep coming to Earth, but they never actually get around to explaining it. The Autobots and Decepticons in this movie are played for jokes, the latter more so than the former. Honestly, I was happier when Megatron was dead because Lockdown was a way better villain. And don’t get me started on Quintessa. It’s hard to feel bad for any of the robots when they die because we know they’re not actually stuck on Earth. They can easily scan a flying vehicle if they want to leave or just miraculously grow jet boots like Optimus Prime did in the last movie. Isabela Moner is a good little actress, but her character Izabella had no part in this movie. If you cut out all of her scenes it would not affect the plot at all. Mark Wahlberg and Sir Anthony Hopkins are in this movie just to cash a check. Hell everybody is in this movie just to cash a check. Well everybody except for Peter Cullen. I’m pretty sure he refused to come back and they just used recordings they already had him do for previous movies. Every other line he says is “I am Optimus Prime”. His role is no more than a glorified cameo anyways. More so than any other Transformers movie the focus is on the human characters. While Cade (Mark Wahlberg) and Viviane (Laura Haddock) are nice to look at there isn’t much past that. They are sex symbols and this movie is one big advertisement aimed at adults and kids. There are very few pluses in this film. Those being the great action scenes, some, but not all of Cogman’s antics, Viviane’s aunts, and that three-headed dragon transformer that we barely see. It is with great sadness that I give Transformers: The Last Knight a Bad 4/10! More than likely this movie will make a billion dollars and they’ll crank out another one and right the ship. Hopefully it’s the final one and hopefully they cancel that Bumblebee movie!

This Is the End mini Review


This Is the End is by far one of the funniest movies I have seen come out of Hollywood in a long time! The actors do not shy away from making fun of themselves in every which way. Now a sequel is unnecessary, but a sidequel would be entertaining! I give This Is the End an Excellent 10/10, because James Franco is petty! Tom Petty!

Pain & Gain Review


I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, The Rock just makes everything better. Not saying this would have been a bad movie without him. It just wouldn’t have been as good, or funny. Pain & Gain is by far one of the more interesting movies I’ve seen this year. Michael Bay still can still make a good movie without it having ginormous explosions. Based on a true story of bodybuilders who kidnapped a man to get his money, it was a little out there. There are times when watching this film you start to think that there is no way it actually happened, but then a message pops up to remind you that it’s a true story. I’m sure they embellished on some of the details to make it more fun. Mark Wahlberg and Anthony Mackie work well together as a duo, but when you throw Dwayne Johnson in the mix you get a party. Wahlberg plays his typical character and he does it well, but Mackie was pretty funny and stole many scenes. A specific one involves him drinking breast milk in a strip club. Who knew Papa Doc was also a comedian!? In the beginning you don’t see the main characters as bad guys. Heck they actually seem pretty normal, just down on their luck. Then as the film goes on you see how crazy they actually are. from watching the trailers I expected Johnson’s character to be just another one of the group. Cool, calm, and collected just like all of his other movie roles. I soon junked that theory as I saw he was a Christian ex-con with a heart of gold. He was the only one in the film who seemed to have a conscience. Even when he was strung out on coke he still seemed like a nice guy. The plot, I will admit is a little out there, and the main characters are not the sharpest tools in the shed. If I can be honest, that’s what kept me watching. I love movies that are crazy and wild. That’s why Crank 2 is one of my favorites. This film is well worth seeing in theaters and perfect for kick starting your summer movie season right. It’s a little long, a little raunchy, and a little silly. All things considered I give Pain & Gain a Decent 8/10, because it never hurts to be on Team Jesus!

The Croods Review


I still love going to see kid movies even though I’m 22! What I don’t like is going to see them with kids. I just saw The Croods with my friend and her kids and I felt like a dad. It was funny trying to keep these kids still and not crying. Nonetheless I was still able to enjoy the movie. This movie tickled me and made me think of family. It was a good family movie, but make sure the kids are over 4 before you go. The voice acting was great. I am a big fan of Nicolas Cage, Ryan Reynolds, and Emma Stone. I could see all of them possibly portraying their characters if this were a live action movie. Well all except Cage because he’s rather skinny and  Grug is rather big.  Still they are phenomenal, but I would have to say that my favorite character is Belt. Although his lines are few, his presence in the film was adorable and funny. He even does a bit before the end credits that kids should enjoy. The story was pretty straight forward and there was no true villain. The changing world would be considered the bad guy I guess.  The film boasted beautiful bright colors and amazing looking animals. While they were supposed to be prehistoric, to me they just looked like modern animals fused together. There were animals like turtle-birds, piranha-birds, crocodile-dogs, and land-whales.  Seeing all the colors and grand landscape made me think this would have even been decent in 3D, but since I don’t like 3D I will never know. You’ll have to figure out if its good on your own readers. Even though I’m a child at heart my adult side did notice some inconsistencies. The main one that bugged me were their shoes. There was a scene where Guy (Reynolds) made the Croods some shoes so that they could transverse across the spiky barren seabed. In the next scene these shoes just disappear off of their feet, only to reappear at the end of the film. I just didn’t understand why they couldn’t wear the shoes throughout the whole film, especially after seeing how much the ladies loved them.  Speaking of the ending, I thought it could have worked so much more if Grug had died, but this is a kids movie so him surviving was a must. I could easily see The Croods getting a sequel within the next few years if it continues to do well at the box office. Hopefully we can see where their adventures have taken them and meet some more cave people who have made it into tomorrow! I give The Croods a Decent 7.5/10…Dun-Dun-Daaaaaaaah!